Generation Y's Howard Beale (dk) wrote,
Generation Y's Howard Beale
dk

*exhales*

*collects self*

---

i hate this end-of-the-year depression i always get.

i can see this pattern repeating itself annually...

---

so i've had the Completely Shitty Breakup, that's usually the first part.

if things progress on schedule, sometime in the next two weeks i'll be presented with an opportunity that seems like a good idea, but in reality is an incredibly bad one...

& after that, i throw away another year of my life trying to make something work with someone whose incompatibilities with myself i'm willing to turn a blind eye to in order to feel some sort of fleeting validation. (i love run-on sentences. fuck you.)

---

but seeing as i recently turned down what was at once a Really Attractive Proposal and an Incredibly Bad Idea, maybe i've already broken the cycle.

doing so cost me a friend, and a lover.

at least one of each.

possibly even two of each.

do not ask me to explain that.

---

blah, one in the morning, and i'm wide awake at my parents, with the 8th i just bought safely stashed somewhere *at home*.

hopefully, that will seem more like it was a good idea sometime in the near future.
right now it very much does not.
fuck me, am i really going to make it to friday?
well, tonight will be the worst.
fuck withdrawal.
fuck psychological withdrawal^2, because i know this is all in my head, and i want it anyway.

---

kinda/sorta wanna go to that party. oh well.

---

yeah, ok, i'm done.
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